Sorry for my one week-hiatus…
I stopped making posts some hours before February 14. And it has happened a lot since that day. A lot. And right now my brain is full of mixed emotions and feelings and I’ve been procrastinating a lot and about to feel anxiety.
Just today I was able to finally relax a bit and make a list about what I need to do.
- Start planning our project for this year’s Science Fair
This year I decided to make the project with the “smart” group of the classroom (which by the way I am part of). You know, the last two years I made the project with my friends, because, I felt like I would let them down if I didn’t help them with the project. And now I can see that the one who “killed” himself every day memorizing and working on the project was me. I was the one who put effort on the project.
But now, this year, our teacher didn’t let us have six members in our group because that was “too much advantage”. And so these days we were discussing about who should be leaving the group.
It did not end up good. And now we gotta make more decisions.
- Speech for Spanish Contest
Ever since I was a kid I’ve loved participating in this kind of contests. I love the feeling I get when I let my thoughts out in front of lots of people. My mom had an important role in this :v
But again, just today our Spanish teacher told us about this contest they are going to have immediately after our Spring Break. And currently, besides dealing with the Science Fair thing, I’ve had some family issues and it has been really hard to concentrate in more than two things. That’s why I told my teacher I would not participate.
But after the class ended, she had a word with me and told me that I was the only person who could actually participate in the contest from my group, because I was the only one who has the ability and experience on this kind of stuff. And so, I finally said yes.
Now I need to make my speech for this friday. Oh my.
- Prepare for the debate
I’ve told you this before. This year my school is going to participate in a debate against other schools from the town. And I am part of the debate team. The debate is in one month, and only this week we started preparing for it =~=
I need to practise my English speaking and listening. And also start looking for facts we need to learn for the debate. There are many topics: Human Clonation, Immigration, Same-sex Marriage, Corruption and some other stuff.
- Talk About-Thursday
It’s been more than a MONTH since I made a Talk About-Thursday post. And I feel so awful for that. I swear that every week I’m like “this is the week. I will finally do something for this Thursday” but something happens and at the end I’m not able to do it. And you have no idea how bad I feel about it.
I love these series. I love them so much. They are part of my blogger-self and I feel thankful for them because somehow they helped me to be the blogger I am today.
It is also hard to plan something when you are also an admin in a Facebook fanpage and must come up with ideas to keep that page alive too.
Possibly I might do Talk About-Thursday this week. Possibly not. I’m not sure anymore. I just hope I have the chance.
- Personal Issues
Now I had the doubt of telling you but I think I can finally do it. I’m tired of keeping too many things in my head.
First of all, I want to begin saying that every person has their little or big preocupation. Don’t you think? And sometimes it’s the society you live in the one who makes you feel pressured to take decisions.
I told you about a girl I like. Right? But I didn’t tell you she also likes me. Now, many persons are telling me to have a relationship with her, because this “is an amazing opportunity”. But the thing is I don’t feel like having a relationship right now.
It’s kinda depressing when you see everyone happy with their boyfriends/girlfriends and knowing that you could be one of them. But I really don’t want anything. I’m sure I wouldn’t know what to do after I asked her out. I have too many things to worry about that I’m afraid I would screw the relationship and make the situation worse than it was.
But it’s also awful, because, she may like me, but the thing is she actually has her eyes on another boy. They had a relationship before but they broke up because of something. And now, they miss each other. Plus, every weekend she goes and visits him and his family. There are some issues on his family which has also made her feel terrible and depressed, because of the illness of an important member of his family.
And then there you have it, she tells me how bad she feels for him and how much she wants things to be like they used to be before. And how she feels bad because she is sure nobody feels the way she feels.
But recently a member of my family just passed away. Like a couple of weeks ago. And it is hard to listen at the problems of someone who “likes you” but likes another guy more, and how she is upset, and really doesn’t show any interest on what I would say; while I see my dad struggling to smile like he used to do and not to show us how awful he feels. I admire him for what he is doing.
Not saying it’s her fault. She has the right to say what she wants to say and her reactions are of course different than mine. But a little bit of empathy wouldn’t be bad either. Don’t you think?
Thanks for reading all the way down this post. It truly means a lot. And it certainly feels better to share my thoughts with you guys.
How was your week? How are you? Everything all right? I’ll be reading what you have to say if you want 🙂
I missed you guys.
The sky is the start line.